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COHF has killed me.

cassandraclare:

hi Cassie! idk if you’ve noticed, but I think you’ve invoked a small (and quite entertaining) url revolution. — hornyjem

I did. I am very proud. :)

This is the full story of After the Bridge, a tale for those who might have wondered what Tessa and Jem did after they met on Blackfriars Bridge in the epilogue of Clockwork Princess. If you’ve been waiting to read it until it was done, it is now done.

Those who do not like Tessa&Jem together or Jessa sexytimes probably should skip this. (You will not miss anything that will affect your understanding of later books.) Those who like that sort of thing will find this the sort of thing they like.

After the Bridge alternates POV between Jem and Tessa. This is Part Five, the full story. As this is one short story and not chaptered, each post will contain the whole story from the beginning up to the point where that part ends so that new readers or readers who don’t remember what happened won’t have to hunt down the previous post(s.)

AFTER THE BRIDGE : Now with (sexy) art by Cassandra Jean! 

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Tagged as: tid,


howthehoolychillz:

floodedwithlight:

namelessstreets:

Louis CK nailing it every time.

i love this man.

Please don’t blow your dogs.

a-little-more-me-needed:

scottishshortbread:

kmykmykmy:

Gryffindor: I’m a fucking hero.
Slytherin: I’m fucking badass.
Ravenclaw: I’m smart as fuck.
Hufflepuff: My dorm is near the kitchen.

image

Hufflepuff wins



mangaluva:

Sometimes I can’t stop thinking about how Zuko accidentally spoke against his father and begged for forgiveness, on his knees with tears in his eyes, and got half his face burned off and banished from his home

Then Zuko betrayed his uncle and everything Iroh had ever taught him, begged for forgiveness on his knees with tears in his eyes, and got a hug and complete forgiveness and unconditional love



croatoancore:

me? have a boyfriend? no, i try to focus on the more important things in life

like crying over character development




titanswithnoprivateslivein221b:

leviswaxedass:

dahniwitchoflight:

leviswaxedass:

disneydamselestelle:

scottylubemeup:

THIS WAS A CHILDRENS MOVIE

A CHILDRENS BIBLE MOVIE

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Amen

FUN FACT: in hebrew, “feet” is a euphemism for genitals.

so if you ever see “washing feet” in the bible, it, uh. yeah.

(source is my old bible class textbook which i don’t have on me anymore :( )

HOLY SHIT WHAT

I MEAN CORRECT ME IF IM WRONG BUT I SWEAR TO GOD I REMEMBER READING A STORY IN THE BIBLE WHERE JESUS CLEANED THE ‘FEET’ OF A LADY PROSTITUTE INFRONT OF HIS TWELVE DISCIPLES WHO GOT SERIOUSLY GROSSED OUT. THEM GETTING REALLY SUPER GROSSED OUT BY THAT NEVER MADE SENSE TO ME UNTIL NOW.

JESUS CHRIST JESUS.

YOU NASTY.

#WHAT ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO DO WHEN JESUS IS THE ONE WHO NEEDS JESUS

THAT HASHTAG I”m—-—

WHAT


the-dragons-thoughts:

Imagine finding a dragon egg one day, and it hatches in your house and thinks you’re its mom. Then the next morning you wake up and find this mini dragon has gathered all the lose change and shiny objects in your house in a pile, and is gnawing on a nickel. And then when you take it out for walks, it picks up every coin it sees cause its a hoarder. And your house is eventually full of coins. And you are rich. And have a dragon.





willsmiff:

kayleyhyde:

We all know that feeling, vending machine


andreafluff:

instadayum:

kamikaze95:

nowyoukno:

Remember IT IS NOT A WOMAN’S RESPONSIBILITY TO PREVENT RAPE. In the world we live in, however, women should be empowered with any tools in order to protect themselves. Source for more facts follow NowYouKno

:-))

i think the best but also saddest thing about this is that MEN created this product to protect women from MEN

Preach.


ktmakesart:

Don’t befriend writers unless you want texts like this at 4:17 in the morning.


miss-nerdgasmz:

we-are-chemically-romantic:

STOP ITS NOT EVEN FUNNY IT WAS LIKE 3AM WHEN I MADE THIS

cards against rainbow sea cow

queerahim-bitch:

trainerdelaney:

happysellout96:

jean-luc-gohard:

I was born in the wrong generation. This generation is still racist as fuck and I can’t download a pizza. Wake me up in the year 3019.

*Update from the year 3000* not much has changed but we live underwater

How’s my great-great-great-granddaughter?

She’s doin’ fine




excepttheeyes:

Tell them whatever you like. But make it quick, Remus. I want to commit the murder I was imprisoned for.



Nice to meet you, I'm Jess! I'm just your basic tea loving girl trying to make her way in the world.





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